How To Start a Conversation with a Boy

Most girls find it a little intimidating to start a conversation with a boy that they are interested in. This is particularly useful if you are a shy girl. Under ideal circumstances he would walk up to you and start a conversation. There are however times when it is important and appropriate for you to make the first move. If you do not act there is no telling when the opportunity will present its self again.  Here are four easy steps to initiating the conversation.

Step One: Make eye contact.
Step Two: Smile.
Step Three: Wave him over to you.
Step Four: Say “Hi, my name is _______,” and ask a questions

There are three important elements to this technique.

One – The Smile. This is important because it says “hello I am friendly and approachable”  and “I might be interested in you” Most guys will not make a move unless they think you might be interested in them. 
Two – The Wave . This separated him from his friends. It is hard for even the most outgoing of girls to approach a group of guys. If you wave him over, he is then walking to you and he feels like he is initiating the conversation. He also does not have any one that he is trying to impress (besides you).
Three – The Question. The reason why this is important is it gets both people engaged in the conversation before anyone has a chance to feel awkward or self-conscious.  Sometimes you will pick a question spontaneously at the spur of the moment. At other times you will have prepared a question for this encounter beforehand.

Sample questions might include:

What book can you read over and over again?
What is the strangest food you have ever eaten?
What subject do you wish you had paid more attention to in school?
What makes you laugh?
What is your all time favorite joke?
If you were going to do karaoke tonight, what song would you sing?
What was the first thing you learned how to cook?
What is the funniest movie that you have ever seen?
What in your life is more important than money?
What Olympic sport would you like to try?
What is your favorite book you read as a child?
When was the first time you saw the ocean?

You can find more questions at our top questions page

Practice.  As with anything this becomes easier with practice.  You can role play with a friend if you just want to make sure you have the flow of the words and actions.  You can also pick  a practice boy to talk with. There is nothing wrong with this just make sure you are in a safe environment.  Your goal may be to simply have a two minute conversation with a stranger or casual acquaintance.  You could even make a new friend on your practice attempt.

Final Notes.  All though this is written with college aged girls in mind it has proven successful in both older and younger environments.   Remember to relax and have fun. If you are having fun chances are he is having fun.

Asking the right questions is more important than knowing the answer.                    home

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